And the "poetry." The romantic pleas of Olen Valazquez, "I will never be easy till I have you safe again in the pleasure. On deck, I made her a soft place with my cloak; and the never seen to less advantage than from above downward." Or the dramatic verse from mirinesceipdri: "Jim, youre wonderful! Madonette said, grabbed and kissed me. Youre catching on. After this last criminal assignment for us you filled the bill."

I can imagine the thoughts of someone who finds this profound: "The punctuation is a little rough. But it's like hip-hop music. I don't really get it but know there is something there."

Admittedly, "real" poetry is hard enough for some to understand. We nod our heads in fake understanding. To admit you don't really get Shakespeare, or Bob Dylan, is to acknowledge an intellectual shortcoming.

But what kind of nutcase would confuse this with meaning? To see any depth in this verse represents the literary equivalent of a spam victim, someone who actually believes a Nigerian diplomat's widow holds the key to his financial future.

Truly, the spammers are playing with us. They send out a million messages and get a thousand new suckers, so it doesn't really matter how many people they annoy.

As long as there are people who invest in bad stock or buy bogus weight pills, the spammers will earn their keep. Spoetry is just something they invented out of boredom.

What's next? We already know. Several spammers have sent out threatening notes to people on mailing lists telling them they have been targeted for a mob hit that can only be called off if they pay off the contract.

The fact that no one has actually fallen for this makes us look a little smarter. Will spam ever go away? Those who say it won't should have more faith in humanity.

If you have questions or suggestions for Charles Bermant, you can contact him by e-mail at cbermant@seattletimes.com. Type Inbox in the subject field. More columns at www.seattletimes.com/columnists.