As a parent, you'll face many unforeseen situations with your children.

The world of commerce might be one such environment. Here's a situation to illustrate: Sophie, a third-grader, saw an advertisement for a sewing project clearly marked "free." She was eager to fill out and mail in the order form, receive the project and complete it.

She told her parents about the deal. Their cautious response: "Nothing's free." While they discouraged Sophie from applying for the project, she persisted by reading all the fine print. She saw nothing about hidden expenses regarding shipping and handling fees and proceeded to fill out the application and put it in the mail.

In time, the sewing project arrived. Sophie busied herself by completing the project, fully satisfied with her work and the fact that she had this nice craft project to display — and all for free! A few weeks later, her pride turned to dismay when a bill for $8 arrived in the mail.

Sophie was mad and sad. Mad because she felt betrayed by the company who told her the project was "free," and sad because she was robbed of the pleasure and pride she once felt.

After her emotions settled, her parents offered her a choice: Mom and Dad would pay the bill, or she could write a letter to the company. Sophie chose the latter and waited for a response that never arrived. What did arrive was another bill.

Now what? Should the parents pay the bill? Should they attempt to call the customer-service department of the company that mailed the project? Should they write a letter explaining the situation?

As the parents decide how they'll respond, it's less important for them to think about the bill from the company and more about the lessons Sophie will learn. This situation teaches her about some mail-order companies, advertising, hidden expenses and marketing tactics that target children.

You likely have your own stories of similar situations. One mom remembers her son watching a commercial on TV for free gold toy cars. All the child needed to do was fill out an order form on a cereal box and drop it in the mail. He did, and waited for the cars to arrive in the mail. They never did.

He, too, felt betrayed. To this day, the mother regrets not following up with the corporation who failed to deliver the goods as promised.

A dad tells of his sons who ordered bowls offered on a cereal box. Again, the bowls never arrived. Finally, he gave a call to the customer-service department of the corporation offering the bowls and — lo and behold — a week or so later, the bowls arrived in the mail.

The parent modeled appropriate action, appearing proactive rather then powerless.

Parents can't keep or protect children from the world of commerce, but they can teach them to be well-informed consumers and apprise them of the sometimes-wily ways of corporate advertising and marketing tactics. Plus, it's the parents' job to take action on behalf of their children when necessary. Doing so is simply part of what it means to be a parent today.

Jan Faull, a specialist in child development and behavior, answers questions of general interest in her column. You can e-mail her at janfaull@aol.com or write to: Jan Faull, c/o Families, The Seattle Times, PO Box 70, Seattle, WA 98111. More columns at www.seattletimes.com/columnists