Sometimes I wonder how kids make the transition from video games to driving. They get behind the wheel and try to replicate that rush of speed and adrenaline.

What is the relationship between violent game and violent behavior in teenagers?
We still don’t know if there’s a direct correlation between violent games and violent behavior. But we can say that children are very vulnerable. Adolescents are very vulnerable. If they are very vulnerable, how do they integrate that violent game, that violent message, etc., in their own creation of meaning?

How should parents communicate with their teenagers about these concerns?
It’s tricky. As teenagers are separating from the family, they want to be left alone. They want to be in their room. And the natural tendency of the parents is to say, "Okay. I’ll let them be. It’s part of the developmental process. I’ll just let them go." What happens is that they separate so far that the parents lose connection with them altogether.

You need still to obligate them to be with you at the dinner table, obligate them to participate in activities that the family does together. And it’s important to look out for warning signs that something is wrong, like the academics suddenly going downhill.

Why are teenagers so often attracted to alcohol and cigarettes?
Peer pressure, oppositional behavior, and the invincible feeling are all reasons why teenagers gravitate toward these behaviors.

How do you keep your child from jumping into any of the behaviors that you’re concerned about?
Hopefully, by the time your child reaches adolescence, you’ve already been communicating with them. So you begin to talk about critical thinking. You begin to instill in the child the self-assessment and judgement skills that they need to make decisions. And they begin to say, "I’m going to say no to some of this stuff. I’m not doing this because my mom or my dad or my guardian told me. I’m doing it for myself."

You need to communicate constantly with your teenager, early and often. When you communicate, make sure that you’re encouraging self-esteem. I think the tendency is to belittle or degrade or demean adolescents and that’s the worst thing for them because they’re already struggling with their own bodies, with their own person. Communicate with your teenager, and be supportive.